Hey there! This post was written in 2008, so it may contain information that is no longer accurate or thoughts that no longer reflect how I feel. As human beings, we're constantly learning and bettering ourselves through experiences and interactions with the world and each other.
I keep posts like this around for historical purposes and to prevent link rot, so please keep this in mind as you're reading.
Sometimes I just want it to be dark forever. I want to feel the cold air inside my lungs and walk aimlessly through the night. I need to feel like it's out there…like it's really out there and that I can get to it. I need to know if what I need is really what I seek, and if what I seek is really what I need.
It's been a long time since I could feel it…that gut feeling that what I'm doing is right. That deep down feeling that isn't there anymore. I need to know where it went. I need it to call out to me so I can be reassured that it's not a lost cause. I need to feel alive again.